Here we present some excellent kissing tips that will help you avoid the most silly and embarrassing mistakes a lot of people tend to make. You really need to be aware of these if you wish to make your experience of kissing that someone special all the more memorable.
How to Lead someone into kissing you
Before we get on to the actual kissing tips, let’s warm up to the challenge of kissing someone for the first time with this excellent video. The video clearly demonstrates most of the kissing strategies and step by step kissing tips that we have presented here on this page as well as throughout the rest of the website. This is the first video we would recommend you to watch if you haven’t been kissing a lot of people of late.
You might ask what’s the big deal about it. It’s only a simple kiss, right? Well, you couldn’t be more wrong. The fact of the matter is that no one likes to date a bad kisser and your kissing styles may even portray you in a certain light. If you fail to impress that special person in that first kiss, it’s likely the other person would not want to kiss you ever again.
A lot of people also think that kissing is a natural act and that you don’t really need to learn it. Once, again, far from reality. I have seen a number of lousy kissers go without a real date for a long period of time. While it’s true that you don’t have to make an act of kissing really complicated, mastering the art of kissing will go a long way in building up a strong romantic relationship. You don’t want your partner to take your kisses for granted and not really look forward to them any more. It’s like having food- you can’t have the same dish every single day, or you will stop looking forward to it. You need to spice it up frequently to enjoy it.
Not many of us are born good kissers. Most of us tend to learn that by trial and error. The aim of this website is to turn you into a great kisser (that women love to talk about) and eliminate the errors from the trials.
Another thing that you ought to know about kissing is that more often than not, your partner won’t tell you if you don’t kiss too well. You might remain unaware of the mistakes you might be making while you kiss, until your partner decides to walk out on you. These tips will also help you understand if your kissing style and techniques need to be worked upon.
And then, there is yet another dimension to kissing that you will need to be aware of. Different people kiss in different ways and each one of them has his/her own preferred way of kissing. It’s possible that your partner may find your kissing style not up to the standards set by his/her previous partner.
So, you see, it’s a lot more complicated than you actually thought it was. However, by following our guides and the step by step kissing techniques presented throughout this website, you really won’t have anything to fear about. Check out the various tips that we present here and in other parts of this website to build up a solid foundation which can be used to develop your own brand of kissing style- one that all your partners will love and make them keep coming back for more.
Top 10 Tips On How To Kiss Well
1. Ensure that your partner is also ready and equally willing to kiss you.
The fact that you are out on a date with someone and you’re both having a good time does not mean he or she wants to kiss you or is ready to be kissed by you. Remember, there is no rush, especially if you have not kissed that person before.
Don’t be too impatient and always respect the feelings of your partner. Don’t walk around just thinking of when, how and where you are going to make your move. Just enjoy every moment you are spending together. If you end up kissing, great! And, if you don’t end up kissing it’s not bad either. It will only be bad (in your mind) if that has been the only thing you have been focusing on during the date.
If it is clear that he or she is not ready or in the mood to kiss you, don’t take it personally. It does not mean he or she does not like you. Remember, there can be any number of reasons why your partner does not want to kiss you and in most cases the reason(s) will have nothing to do with you. Some people just don’t like the idea of kissing their partner on the first date or even on the second date.
However, sometimes your partner may not want to kiss you for reasons that have pretty much everything to do with you. And this brings us to the second kissing tip…
2. Look after yourself!
Chances are good your partner won’t even notice if the wind has blown your hair a little out of place and won’t mind if you have a pimple on your face. But, personal hygiene is important and you need to look after yourself!
Nobody likes to kiss someone that has dry or chapped lips. And, even worse, bad breath. Yuck! It is simply gross! If your lips are dry or chapped make sure to apply to lip balm regularly and give your lips some time to get better before you try to kiss someone. Make sure you brush your teeth before going out on a date and carry some breath mints with you that you can suck before you move in for the kiss. And, if you prefer gum instead make sure to spit it out before kissing! (I have had gum transferred to my mouth a couple of times and it is not cool).
In addition, your hair, hands and body should be clean. Have a bath or a shower before your date. Bad body odor, dirty hair, fingers and nails are not cool!
Girls, go easy on the makeup! It is normal that you want to look your best but your boyfriend does not want to have a face full of powder or your lipstick on his mouth after kissing you. In any case, most guys prefer girls that wear little or no makeup to girls that plaster themselves with makeup.
Guys, if you have stubble shave it off. You may think it is cool and manly but your girlfriend may not appreciate being sandpapered while kissing you and you don’t want to give her a bad rash.
Lastly, dress well. You don’t need to dress like a fashion model or a celebrity but make sure you are presentable and that your clothes are neat and your shoes are clean.
3. Try to avoid kissing in public.
There is nothing wrong with showing affection in public. But, kissing someone passionately in public is not a good idea, especially not if it is the first time you’re kissing that person.
It does not matter how confident or self-assured you are, your partner may not appreciate your friends or strangers staring at him or her while you’re kissing. In addition, it may cause other people to feel uncomfortable, especially if they have small children with them.
When you kiss someone special you want to give him or her your full and undivided attention. Being aware of people looking at you while you’re kissing your partner may cause you to feel more self-conscious and chances are that since you will already be feeling a little bit nervous before kissing that knowing other people are watching you kiss will only amplify your uneasiness and this may very well spoil the moment.
If you have been dating for a while and are comfortable kissing your partner a short but meaningful kiss in public should not be a problem for anyone. But, if you want to kiss someone special for the first time then rather find a more private place in which to do it.
And, by private I am not talking about your bedroom! That may be a bit too private for your first kiss and may create the wrong impression with your partner about what your intentions are. To be on the safe side, choose a place where you have some privacy from curious bystanders but where you are in close proximity to other people.
4. Give your partner clear signals.
It’s important that you give your partner clear signals that you wish to kiss him or her or that you are ready, willing and eager to be kissed. In principle you should never ask your partner for permission to kiss him or her. Asking for permission is very old-fashioned, childish and it shows a lack of self-confidence on your part. In addition, by asking for permission you may very likely spoil the moment for both you and your partner.
So how can you give your partner clear signals if you should not verbally express your desire to kiss or to be kissed? Well, you have to make your intentions clear through your body language. Fact of the matter is that about 90% of communication is nonverbal anyway and it’s not hard to show your partner through your body language that you want to kiss him or her. And, by paying attention to the body language of your partner you will also know whether he or she is ready to kiss you.
Using body language to communicate your intentions and to interpret the intentions of your partner may seem difficult. However, nothing can be further away from the truth… We all use body language to communicate, whether we are aware of it or not. And, we subconsciously interpret the body language of people we are with. Somebody does not have to tell you that they are happy, upset, excited, sad or nervous. In most cases you will naturally pick up how they are feeling by observing their body language even if they don’t say one word.
The problem is that body language can sometimes be confusing. For example, some people cry when they are happy. And, since you may be nervous before kissing someone special, especially if it is your first kiss, you may be sending that person mixed signals without even being aware of it. He or she may interpret your nervousness as meaning that you are uncomfortable in their presence, are not having a good time and even that you do not like them.
The most important rule in giving your partner clear signals is to RELAX!
It is normal that you may feel a bit nervous but try your best to relax. Guys, most girls will tell you honestly that they appreciate and respect confidence in a guy. You don’t want to come across as being unsure of yourself. And girls, you also need to be confident. Most guys are not attracted to shy, giggly girls.
The best way to communicate your intentions through your body language is by making regular eye contact with your partner and by casually touching him or her several times before moving in for the kiss.
It’s much easier to kiss someone if you have already had some physical contact with that person. If you are not ready to hold his or her hand or if your partner does not want to hold your hand you can be pretty sure that trying to kiss him or her may not be such a great idea.
The same can be said for eye contact. They say our eyes are the windows to our soul. You can learn a lot from someone by looking into his or her eyes. Make a point of establishing regular eye contact with your partner and smile often while looking at him or her. It will be a clear signal that you are enjoying his or her company and that you feel comfortable and at ease being with them.
For some more tips on setting the mood for kissing and body language see how to kiss.
5. Take it slow and easy!
Don’t rush the kiss! By rushing the kiss you may catch your partner by surprise and it can be quite embarrassing for both of you especially if they happen to look away while you are moving in for the kiss. Take it slow and easy!
Generally the guy will make the first move but there are no fixed rules and it does not really matter. Guys, if you want to kiss a girl and if you think she wants to kiss you too just do it! And girls, if you want to kiss a guy but he is a bit shy to make a move then go for it! He will not mind at all! Don’t wait for the other party to make the first move. If you both feel like kissing but neither of you do anything it only becomes awkward.
i. Look into your partner’s eyes and lean towards him or her, clearly showing your intentions.
ii. Touch your partner’s face or hair with your hand or embrace him or her.
iii. Tilt your head slightly to the left or the right as you lean forward. Don’t move in too fast or smile as you move in to prevent you from bumping noses or teeth.
iv. Moisten your lips a little bit. You don’t want it to look too suggestive! But, it’s much nicer kissing slightly moist and smooth lips than dry lips.
v. Close your eyes just before your lips touch. It really feels weird when someone is staring at you while you are kissing them so don’t forget to close your eyes!
6. Kissing should be soft and gentle.
Kissing should be soft, gentle, passionate and meaningful.
Many people mistakenly believe that a passionate kiss has to be an open-mouth French kiss or that passion equals making out with your partner. This is simply not true.
Gentle lip contact without using your tongue can be just as passionate as any other kissing technique. Some people don’t like French kissing and if it’s the first time you are kissing your partner gentle lip contact can be passionate and meaningful at the same time.
Kiss your partner gently on the mouth, pull back and re-establish eye contact for a couple of seconds. If you feel like kissing him or her again (and if your partner has responded well to the first kiss) then lean forward and kiss them again.
7. Use your hands and arms while kissing.
Making out generally involves a lot of touching while kissing someone. However, even if you are only giving your partner a soft and gentle kiss on the mouth don’t just let your arms hang loose at your sides!
Use your hands and arms to caress your partner’s face or hair while kissing or to embrace your partner. It can be very sensual to touch or to be touched while kissing someone.
Guys, by touching I don’t mean groping! Girls do not like to be groped and certainly not during their first kiss! Keep your hands off her private parts or you run the risk that it will be the first and the last time you get to kiss her. Girls, the best way to solve the problem of wondering hands is to simply hold his hands or to place them on your hips or to say ”No!”
8. Deepening the kiss.
If you both feel like it you can deepen the kiss. This does not mean you have to make out or start French kissing. You can deepen the kiss in a number of ways such as by kissing your partner’s upper or lower lip or by gently teasing their lips with the tip of your tongue.
If your partner opens his or her lips you can use the tip of your tongue to caress the inside of their lips or tongue. Don’t just stick your tongue into their mouth! You don’t want to gag them!
Remember to breathe! It’s not cool to kiss someone and then to gasp for air so try to breathe through your nose if possible. Also avoid locking lips with your partner thereby making it hard for them to breathe freely. Feeling like you are being suffocated is a big turnoff!
Kissing often produces excess saliva so remember to swallow regularly but discreetly. Nobody likes to be kissed by someone that is drooling and slobbering all over them!
You may also deepen the kissing experience by not only kissing your partner on the mouth. Girls love to be kissed in the neck and most guys find it a big turn-on when a girl nibbles on their ears. But, whatever you do don’t bite! Guys, kiss her neck softly but be gentle. Girls bruise easily and giving her a hickey is not something she will be pleased with. Girls, don’t bite his ear or lips! He may be too proud to say anything but it’s painful and not enjoyable being bitten!
By kissing your partner in the neck, ears or face I am not saying lick your partner! Nobody likes to be licked in the face! Keep your kisses soft and gentle.
In the future you may want to experiment with different ways of kissing your partner and deepening your kisses. Being predictable and never showing some initiative can be boring. As you get to know your partner better try to come up with some new ways of kissing them to ensure it remains special, exciting and memorable.
9. Don’t go too far too fast.
The fact that your boyfriend or girlfriend is ready and willing to kiss you does not mean he or she wants to make out with you or want to go any further than just a simple kiss.
Always treat your partner with respect and don’t try to go too far too fast. Girls, it is important to set clear boundaries. Guys will often try to see just how far they can get. If he does anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, tell him. He will respect you for that.
Contrary to what some people believe guys prefer to date girls that have clear boundaries to girls that have no boundaries. If you want to get more serious in the future then by all means use your own judgement. But don’t mistake the fact that your partner is willing to kiss you as a green card that you may do whatever you please.
10. After the kiss.
When you are finished kissing don’t just leave your partner. Look into his or her eyes, talk, cuddle or just hold hands. Let your partner know that you enjoyed the kiss. Don’t thank your partner! Your partner was not doing you a favor! But, if you want to you can tell them that you enjoyed the kiss.
Remember that different couples kiss differently and that there is not just one way to kiss someone right. However, I trust that the above mentioned kissing tips will help you to be more confident and comfortable kissing that special person in your life.
Top 10 Sexy Kissing Tips
Here are some tips (submitted by our readers) that you and your partner will absolutely love. If you have a technique of your pain, please share it with us via the comments section below.
- If you are both in bed, lying down, you may try this technique to drive her crazy. Raise one of her arms slightly above her head and hold it there in position. Lean into her side and start by kissing the soft area on the inside of her upper arm. Travel down from her elbow to her chest kissing her softly all along the way. For an added variation, you may try trailing the tip of your tongue all along this path in an irregular zigzag path. She will absolutely love it and ask for some more.
- Women love being kissed on the neck. Here’s how to do it properly- kiss her gently near the collar bone (the clavicle, if you may), followed by trailing the tip of your tongue up to hear ear in a zigzag fashion. Nibble gently on her ear lobes.
- When you are seated, begin to stroke your partner’s face and then slowly move your hand up to his/her mouth and very gently start running one of your fingers on the lip. If your lover seems to like it, push the finger gently into their mouth and let them suck on it. Most guys seem to like this especially and this will eventually lead to a mind blowing French kiss.
- Before the actual kiss happens, start by kissing your partner on the neck, cheek, jaw and slowly move towards the lip. This builds up a great deal of anticipation and the kiss turns out to be even more electric.
- Prepare for the kiss by pouring a glass of wine. Take in a couple of sips to get the taste going in your mouth. Lead your partner to the bed along with the wine. Dip your finger in the wine and trace their lips and mouth with it. Lick off the wine gently taking your time. This will lead up to a very romantic and passionate kiss.
- Play a kissing game with your partner. The game goes like this- you have to make your partner try and kiss you, in one single breath. Take a long breath and begin by kissing their neck, breathing into the ear, kissing the cheeks and then the lips. Whoever lasts longer, wins.
- Whisper slowly while releasing a warm breath slowly near the partner’s ear. Say something like “I need you…” Let them feel your warm breath on their ear. Then kiss them on the ear, nibble on the ear lobe, or stick your lounge lightly into their ear. Move down the ear to the neck and then back up to the mouth.
- At the end of a kiss, get hold of your partner’s upper lip in between your own as you are closing your mouths. Suck lightly for a while before pulling away. That leaves a great feeling after the kiss.
- While in the middle of a passionate kiss, start stroking the nape of the partner’s neck gently with your finger tips or your nails.
- Think of a certain part of your partner’s body that you really like. Give them a kiss and a lick of your tongue on all those parts and then whisper into their ear why you love the body part (you may repeat the tip in point 7 above as you rise up to whisper). Traverse their entire body showering them with lots of kisses and sweet whispers. See them getting crazy for more and pull you into the most passionate kiss ever.